I have written on this before but today as I looked at the options for books in Audible I was reminded of the number of people out there promising the key to finding balance. I have read a number of them and found them helpful. Here is the problem we are trying to balance our lives like we balance things on a scale which is fine if you have only two things to balance. I don't know about your life but I have more like two dozen things I need to balance. So what is the solution?
There is one thing we all know but seldom want to admit, we can NOT do it all. We can't have everything. We can't have our cake and eat it too. Some things in our lives have to go if we are going to live the best life we can. One example from my life was when I quit watching television and movies for two years as I was working on my Masters program. As far as failures, well? I don't want to admit to any but since it would be wrong to put myself out as a person who always did it correctly, here goes. In my late twenties, I was working at a factory 55-65 hours a week, studying for ministry, and doing a complete remodel of a home. I was lucky to get 4-5 good hours of sleep a night. After a year, my body began to fall apart. To be honest, I don't think I have ever fully recovered. So you know I have done it right and I have to use an aviation term, crashed and burned.
So what have I discovered?
Balance in life isn't about balance. A great life is more like a recipe. If you are making a savory dish you avoid sugar. If you are making a sweet dish you don't add a lot of salt. The question we have to ask ourselves is what do we want to make for our lives and what are the correct ingredients and amount to make it correctly. This isn't simple and it takes wisdom, advice (from informed sources not just the ones that you like), and humility.
Like a recipe, life has stages. If you're making a banana cream pie you don't mix the ingredients for the filling with the crust. You make the crust and the filling separately and then you join them. In life, there are times and places for certain things and not others. Later you will see how they join together. Trying to do everything will often result in failure or a finished product that is less than successful. I love cooking and I have at times tried to do too much and ended up burning the cookies, over-mixing the batter, and boiling the pot dry because I couldn't do it all. The coffee was good though, but well you might not want to try the rest. Here is where we have to be humble enough to realize our limits. Knowing them you can work out a system where you may be able to have it all come together without doing it all at the same time. This last year I managed to pull off everything for Thanksgiving coming together and ready to be served when I wanted. It required planning and effort but it worked. It also meant that a couple of things that might have been nice to have on the menu had to go. In the end, no one missed them and it was great.
So to sum it up. the recipe for a balanced life is to remember life is a recipe. The key is to make sure you follow the right one and then to follow it correctly. Finally, you're human so try and give yourself grace when you mess up. If you're going to mess up do it by giving too much time to God, family, and friends because spending too much time there is rarely, if ever, detrimental to a a good life.
Photo by Taylor Kiser on Unsplash